The Book of Bones

From Murambi, The Book of Bones by Boubacar Boris Diop (Warning: graphic violent imagery):

"You know what that means, Jessica Kamanzi? You know how they rape women?"

Yes, I had seen it. Twenty or thirty guys on a bench. Some of them old enough to know better. A woman, sometimes just a frail child, is stretched out against a wall, legs spread, totally unconscious. These good family men aren't into violence. It had chilled my blood to see them chichatting right at the moment when a whole life was coming apart under their very eyes. And among the rapists there are almost always, by design, some who have AIDS.

"I know how they do it," I said.

"When they've finished, they pour acid into your vagina or stick in pieces of broken bottle or pieces of metal."

As I prepare to leave for Rwanda, it becomes overwhelming: what can I possibly do in three weeks to make life any easier for these survivors? What can the world do? And how do we stop what we know is happening right now in the Sudan?

http://www.genocideintervention.net/how_you_can_help/take_action

LGBTQ Representation in Children's Movies

Most children are not aware of sexual orientation, but that doesn't mean they aren't aware of romance. It's treated as an essential aspect of every children's movie (or at least the “classics”), which is natural because love is an essential part of most people's lives. Yet, despite the emergence of same sex couples in other areas of pop culture, there are no such couples to be found in children's films.

There are glimmers of suggestion, such as Timon and Pumba in the Lion King, but there is nothing explicitly romantic. This omission perpetuates the problem of a lack of strong LGBTQ role models as teenagers and young adults start to discover their sexual identity. By failing to expose children to this type of diversity while they are young, we also fail to normalize and accept the various ways sexuality can be expressed.

Can we just acknowledge that Simba has two gay dads and that's awesome? And I'm keeping my hopes up for the day when we have a lesbian Disney princess.

Finals Thoughts on Women in Leadership

I just finished a week at the 21st Century Leadership Academy for Women in Public Life. Some of the take away points:

Be Fierce and Unapologetic
Women are far more likely than men to undercut their statements by apologizing or questioning their expertise. Say what you mean with conviction and don't apologize for going against the grain. If you stand up for what you believe and act ethically, there should be no reason to apologize.

Be Kind
Being unapologetic doesn't mean be cruel. Find empathy for other people and try to view the world as they do. The best leaders can connect with those they are leading. Even if there are people you simply cannot stand, fake a smile and at least be a decent human being. There is never a reason to burn bridges.

Don't Listen to Haters
There will always be someone telling you that you can't do something. Sometimes that person will even be yourself. Don't let it get you down. If possible use it to fuel your motivation, because it feels so good to prove them wrong later.

You Can't Have It All
Some of the most dynamic women I met this week, the ones that deeply impressed me, were very straight forward with their decision to skip a family and pursue their career first. None of them spoke of regret. They were so happy with their work that it didn't feel like a loss. Contrary to the myth the "unfulfilled business woman", it's possible to change priorities and not be miserable. That's not to say that the women with families weren't just as successful and happy, but there are other options.

When in Doubt, Turn to GaGa
"Some women choose to follow men and some women choose to follow their dreams. If you're wondering which way to go, remember that your career will never wake up and tell you it doesn't love you anymore." - Lady Gaga